Posts tagged oprah
Posts tagged oprah
The first time I met Oprah, I had a much better conversation starter than “AAAAAAAAAA.” Actually, we had a lovely discussion about Toni Morrison’s early novels, Josh Groban, and our mutual secret loathing of John Travolta.
Gideon Harris, you are an amateur.
Lady Gaga told Oprah that she is planning to get married and have babies in the future, and as you know, telling Oprah is basically the equivalent of signing a contract. Gaga said she plans to have enough children to form their own “soccer team,” which … whatever. Her children will probably be too crazy for mainstream soccer anyway.
She also said, “Other than this interview, Oprah, I do not intend to speak to anyone for a very long time.” And in the immortal words of Violet, Dowager Countess of Grantham, I ask, “Do you promise?”
I’m over Lady Gaga.
And the betrayal just keeps rolling in.
Rumors spread today that Oprah Winfrey will serve as Blue Ivy Carter’s godmother, a fact which I cannot stomach.
As you all know, my family’s relationship with Oprah (and her furniture) goes back years. Just last Christmas, she holidayed with us in Telluride. I have sat through countless dinners with that insufferable Gayle King, all because my parents will do anything to please Oprah.
And what does it get you? She just abandons you in the night for the next trendy baby. You know, I wasn’t sad to lose the hip-hop community or the Lower West Side or even my now-former maid to the mystery of Blue Ivy Carter — but this one hurts, Oprah.
