Posts tagged mason disick
Posts tagged mason disick
I don’t know which ’90s personality Scott Disick thinks he is (What a necklace!), but with that sassy walk, Mason apparently thinks he is me.
The Kardashian Christmas card was revealed last night, and, wow, is there a lot of room for interpretation. (The other side, featuring Kim, Kylie, and Kendall, is here.)
As far as I can tell, it takes place in Kris Jenner’s fantasy dystopia, circa 2025. Everyone on the planet is dead, except for a select few Kardashians and their plastic surgeon. The plastic surgeon doubles as the family photographer. He’s probably Ryan Seacrest.
Bruce is chemically frozen in that glass tube over there. He can see everything that happens, but no one ever goes over to say hello. Scott, Kanye, and Lamar are dead. Rob is dead. North West is empress of the world, which is why she’s not in this photo. (Of course, empress of the world is largely a figurehead position, considering there are only eleven people left in existence.)
Mason is the only one who grasps how terrible this world is, but unfortunately he has been trapped in his toddler body and can’t do anything to stop Kris and North. (This is true in real life, as well as in Kris’s hellscape.)
This is what Christmas means to the Kardashians.
That’s exactly what the Kardashian children needed — a bowl of candy. And how many times do I have to tell people that Burberry plaid is best used as an accent pattern, and cargo shorts are best used as dishrags?
It’s okay, Mason. I’d cry too, if I were you. Just in general, all the time.
Also, can we just take a moment to contemplate Penelope’s hairline? I am mystified by it.
Sometimes Mason Disick at least tries to be a respectful member of society.
And sometimes he lets Khloe Kardashian bury him, fully-clothed, in sand.
This is how you get fleas.
Watching Penelope Scotland Disick become aware of her horrible surroundings and the bleak life awaiting her is the best part of keeping up with the Kardashians.
Every time the Kardashians go to Paris, I get really nervous for the strength of our relationship with the European Union.
I also hate how they try so hard to be posh in France. It’s time to face it — Mason Disick will never be debonair.
Finally, Mason Disick has done something charming.
I’ve never seen a cat hate life more. And Tom once had a terrifying cat named Nicole 2 that ran away.
Looks like it was a great day of family fun and father-son bonding for Scott and Mason Disick … and their camera crew to capture how great it was.