Posts tagged kate middleton
Posts tagged kate middleton
Another probably-made-up rumor has started about HRH The Baby of Cambridge — this time, that Prince Harry is going around telling people it’s a boy. Of course, this is what I’ve been hoping for since Kate Middleton was just a girl with a dream: boys are boring, future kings are boring (especially when they changed the law to accommodate a potential heiress), and “boys’ fashion” is an oxymoron, no matter what Rachel Zoe thinks.
Given the amount of information and misinformation on both sides, I’m going to just stop listening to rumors and accept the fact that it’s going to be one or the other. Two months to go. Keep telling me it’s going to be okay.
The young Royals spent some time at Warner Bros. Studios today, playing with Batman cars and Harry Potter wands. Now I’m even madder than my spells haven’t been working. Or maybe they have — if that baby is born with horns, you’ll know who to thank.
As she moves into her third trimester, Kate Middleton finally has a noticeable baby bump. I was really starting to hope she’d been lying about the whole royal baby thing, but I guess this is really happening.
There’s a rumor going around that Kim Kardashian sent the Duchess of Cambridge a baby gift, since the two are both due in July and that made Kim “incredibly excited.” (First of all, Kim, you shouldn’t be incredibly excited — this means that your child, if it’s lucky, will be the third-most talked about delivery in July, after Kate’s baby and Kate’s placenta.)
Kim seems to think this will give her and the Duchess something to bond over, kind of like how she went around her wedding chanting, “This is our version of the Royal Wedding!” (Please. It was in a tent.)
But anyway, I guess if you see Kate in a leopard print “maternity” jumpsuit stretched too tight over her backside, you’ll know where she got it.
Doesn’t she have enough flowers already? Good lord.
So far, the “royal baby bump” has been pretty disappointing. The Duchess has pretty much stuck to thick coats that downplay her pregnancy and, even at six months, she is still super-tiny. I was really hoping for a Jessica Simpson-type situation here.
The Duchess of Cambridge told a guy who told reporters, ”I’d like to have a boy and William would like a girl.”
That’s right, she wants a boy. I guess she finally figured out how difficult I can make things for her otherwise. Do not screw me on this, Kate.
Kate Middleton and HRH The Baby of Cambridge toured the National Fishing Heritage Centre (boring) and she was photographed with this mannequin, who appeared very interested in her baby bump.
This has to be the weirdest photograph I’ve ever seen.
P.S. She told onlookers that the baby is moving now, so obviously that’s the major news story around the world today.
You see a “royal baby bump.” I see the end of all my hopes and dreams. I hope it’s worth it to you.
In case you thought I’d forgotten about Kate Middleton and her magical pregnancy, fret not. She’s just been lying low, contemplating her horrible portrait, and wearing capes to Starbucks. (Newsflash: capes are the new maternity must-have.)
The Duchess will make an appearance in two weeks at Hope House, an addiction treatment facility, so get your baby bump binoculars polished.