Suri's Burn Book

Looking pretty good, Alba-Warrens, except for Haven’s flyaways. (Get that baby some hairspray.) Honor’s fashion choices are really maturing, although it’s probably time for her to start wearing high heels already. 

Aside from Jessica Alba’s slouchy-granny outfit and the messy hair going on, this is pretty good Easter style (if slightly overwhelming with the pastels). Love Honor’s springy take on the color of the year, everyone’s shoes, and the suspicious scowl from Haven, who may be the most surprising ginger in the industry. 

Honor Warren thinks she is so cool, but I know all of her clothes are made out of synthetic fabrics. And her hair is a weave. 

So I actually don’t think these are the same embarrassing shiny pink leggings that Honor Warren wore four months ago. Which means that Honor Warren has two pairs of embarrassing shiny pink leggings — and that’s two more pairs than anyone should ever have.

First of all, eating outside is gross.

Jessica Alba recently reported that her daughter, Honor Warren, wants to be a “doctor mermaid” when she grows up. That is not a thing. I assume she means she wants to be a mermaid who is also a doctor, and not a doctor who treats mermaid patients, although neither one probably has great career prospects.

At least she’s pretty.

Proving once again that she is fearless beyond comprehension, Honor Warren had her picture taken with “Cinderella’s Fairy Godmother” at Tokyo Disney over the weekend. 

This is terrifying. A fake face with human hands? Has someone been incepting my nightmares and turning them into theme park characters?

It must be nice to have no worries. Honor probably doesn’t even know how much more famous than her I am.

Oh, no, Honor Warren! Don’t you know being barefoot in a public park is how you get West Nile Virus? Even your baby sister is concerned.