Suri's Burn Book

Suri's Burn Book

Just because you don't have a Ferragamo handbag doesn't mean you can behave like a child. (I'm looking at you, Shiloh.)

Posts tagged jennifer garner

243 notes

Well, now I feel bad. Jennifer Garner got flustered on Ellen earlier this week, finding herself unable to quickly provide her children’s names and ages, and sharing stories that made her and Mr. Affleck sound like the hillbilly parents we know they kind of are.

But when Ellen jokingly called her out on it, Jennifer said, “Talk to Brad and Angie, they seem to have it together… I call my kids Shiloh sometimes.”

I know I give this family a lot of grief, but Shiloh Jolie-Pitt is on a completely different plane of disgrace than the Afflecks. No one, not even Violet, deserves to be called Shiloh.

Filed under jennifer garner violet affleck shiloh jolie pitt

68 notes

As if overalls weren’t bad enough, Seraphina Affleck had to a choose a pair that don’t even fit her properly.
Actually, I take that back. I don’t know how overalls are supposed to fit.
I do know that I live with a person who has eerily similar boots, Jennifer Garner, and they have only led to sad and unfashionable things.

As if overalls weren’t bad enough, Seraphina Affleck had to a choose a pair that don’t even fit her properly.

Actually, I take that back. I don’t know how overalls are supposed to fit.

I do know that I live with a person who has eerily similar boots, Jennifer Garner, and they have only led to sad and unfashionable things.

Filed under seraphina affleck jennifer garner

91 notes

Fourth of July provided the first glimpse of Samuel Affleck — happy birthday, America.
I think he looks a little like Violet, a lot like Jennifer Garner’s mom (why do I know that???), and also kind of like a Gringotts goblin.

Fourth of July provided the first glimpse of Samuel Affleck — happy birthday, America.

I think he looks a little like Violet, a lot like Jennifer Garner’s mom (why do I know that???), and also kind of like a Gringotts goblin.

Filed under samuel affleck jennifer garner

78 notes

Am I on glue?
Jennifer Garner’s dress does not have stains on it, and Violet looks positively decent. Actually, I would wear every piece of Violet’s outfit.
Except the glasses.

Am I on glue?

Jennifer Garner’s dress does not have stains on it, and Violet looks positively decent. Actually, I would wear every piece of Violet’s outfit.

Except the glasses.

Filed under violet affleck jennifer garner

50 notes

Excuse me for not getting overly excited about Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner’s new baby. They had a boy, Samuel Garner Affleck, earlier this week.
It’s a big deal for a few reasons:
1) The Afflecks had made it pretty clear that while they would let a son live under their roof, they really just wanted another daughter. Oops.
2) Wow, their kids’ names (Violet, Seraphina, and Samuel) just do not go together at all.
3) Look at these people. It’s not a big deal.

Excuse me for not getting overly excited about Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner’s new baby. They had a boy, Samuel Garner Affleck, earlier this week.

It’s a big deal for a few reasons:

1) The Afflecks had made it pretty clear that while they would let a son live under their roof, they really just wanted another daughter. Oops.

2) Wow, their kids’ names (Violet, Seraphina, and Samuel) just do not go together at all.

3) Look at these people. It’s not a big deal.

Filed under jennifer garner

34 notes

Jennifer Garner’s clothes and career can both be best described as “shapeless.”

Also, Starbucks really jumped the gun on the red cups this year. Putting them out in early November just devalues the entire red-cup concept. I myself won’t acknowledge the holiday season until the Third Avenue Bloomingdale’s puts up its Christmas window display. 

It’s okay, though, Starbucks. I still love you.

Filed under jennifer garner seraphina affleck Suri Cruise