Spoiler alert, Honor Warren. You’re getting a Barbie Power Wheels for Christmas. Power Wheels are for tree-hugging plebeians who love electric cars but can’t afford a Tesla.
There’s been a lot of speculation about what’s on my Christmas list this year. Reports estimate my list tops out at $130,000. While I haven’t actually done the math, that estimate is probably in the ballpark, although the items are totally off the mark. Here’s a better look at what I’m asking “Santa” for this holiday season:
A Clover coffee machine.
A complete set of Lenox china in the Pearl Platinum setting (for the treehouse).
Chanel No. 22 Classic Parfum — stocking stuffer.
Whatever iPhone case Victoria Beckham has.
A miniature horse.
A regular-sized horse.
A Tiffany horseshoe pendant in diamonds and rose gold to wear while riding either horse.
Enough CROX stock so I can burn the company to the ground. (Figuratively.)
The complete series of Mad Men on Blu-Ray, plus a lunch date with Matthew Weiner to discuss my ideas for next season.
I’d like to have a U.S. Senator in my pocket. Preferably not a freshman. Preferably on the Appropriations Committee.
The Missoni for Target bicycle — I don’t know how this became a status symbol, but it did and so I want one.
A long weekend at George Clooney’s villa on Lake Como, including yacht access. Not including Katie Holmes.
Real estate is also always nice, too.