Britain’s Prime Minister, David Cameron, is taking a stand for ladies everywhere. See, current law states that male heirs take precedence in the royal line of succession, even if they have older, more competent sisters. Cameron is hoping to modernize the monarchy by making the throne go to the firstborn, no matter what.
Listen, David. (Can I call you David?)
I am all for gender parity and equal pay for equal work and girl power, but does it have to be right now?
You know how I feel about Kate Middleton’s prospective children — I’ve written you several letters preemptively asking for your sensitivity toward this subject, which is admittedly difficult for me. And now you’ve decided you’d like this hypothetical firstborn princess to be a queen, as if she didn’t have enough already.
I’m really disappointed, and you’ve put me in a real jam here.
I can’t publicly oppose a policy that gives women the respect they deserve, but I also can’t support a policy that’s going to make a monarch out of my unborn nemesis. I suppose I’ll just have to grin and bear it — and pray that, boy or girl, this eventual child gets the Windsor hairline.