There’s a rumor going around that Beyonce is pregnant — or, at least, that she’s going to be pregnant soon. According to People, “Beyoncé and Jay are planning for another baby after her tour is over and things calm down just a bit.”
A year ago, when Blue Ivy was just an infant full of promise, I would have quaked in fear at this rumor. Now that she’s a toddler who wears jeans and cotton/poly blends … whatever, Beyoncé.
Nahla Aubry is looking pretty sassy for a girl who’s about to get a new late-in-life “miracle” brother. Enjoy your last few months of freedom — you are very brave. (Also, what happened to the bottom of your dress? Scissors accident?)
So, no, of course it’s not true that I’m starting my own fashion line. Don’t you think I do enough for the fashion community just by existing? Now they want me to dress the masses? Everyone knows I don’t like to work, and I especially don’t want to be associated with anything off-the-rack.
Harper Beckham’s lunchbox is so last season, and so is smiling at the paparazzi. Get with it, Harper — it’s all about scowling now.
Snooki, apparently now a baby expert, has ideas about what Kim and Kanye should name their baby: Kougar for a boy and Kat for a girl, “so it can still be in the family business.”
I mean, those can’t be any worse than what they’re actually going to choose for Baby Kardashian-West. Honestly, nothing can make this baby’s life any more embarrassing than it’s already going to be.
A beautiful dress ruined when sharp scissors got into the wrongs hands. Just like my bangs.
Another probably-made-up rumor has started about HRH The Baby of Cambridge — this time, that Prince Harry is going around telling people it’s a boy. Of course, this is what I’ve been hoping for since Kate Middleton was just a girl with a dream: boys are boring, future kings are boring (especially when they changed the law to accommodate a potential heiress), and “boys’ fashion” is an oxymoron, no matter what Rachel Zoe thinks.
Given the amount of information and misinformation on both sides, I’m going to just stop listening to rumors and accept the fact that it’s going to be one or the other. Two months to go. Keep telling me it’s going to be okay.
Blue Ivy Carter, tallest sixteen-month-old ever, got onstage with Beyonce at her concert last night. Because the Carters want Blue’s life to be private, except when they can create a spectacle.
UPDATE: Not Blue Ivy. Just a fan. Because people bring toddlers to Beyonce concerts.
Pink’s baby Willow: not amused by bike transportation. Can’t say I blame her — also, I’m not amused by her shoes in the least.
Nick and Mariah renewed their vows last night at Disneyland, in a fairytale-themed attentionfest that they somehow coerced 250 guests into attending. (It was also in celebration of Moroccan and Monroe’s birthday, although you’d never have known it, by the looks of things.)
I’m pretty sure Mariah is still mad that the twins’ birth was overshadowed by the biggest news weekend of 2011, and she’s trying to make up for it. Next year: vow renewal on the moon.